The first few weeks of university were filled with nervous excitement. Having labs that ended at 7pm didn’t sound bad since that meant I would get home around 9pm and to me that was freedom. Being an adult was in something like my mom not questioning where I was coming from that late, when 6pm had been my curfew for years. This was all nice to experience but university wasn’t just that. I had enrolled in a program with none of my high school friends, meaning that I was left all alone to deal with that, or at least I thought.
We don’t talk enough about the amount of effort it takes to maintain surface level friendships, people whom you know you are talking to only because they are your contact for any class related questions. That ate me alive. I wanted to find someone who we would hit-it-off right away, something akin to meeting a long time friend. That didn’t happen but I also couldn’t just isolate myself, putting myself out there is the only way to eventually make lifelong friends after all.
This is not to say that being alone in a program is the end of it, rather to say kindness still exists. There are still people willing to respond to texts from strangers in discord group chats, there are people whom you will send emails and eventually meet in person. There will be a person who meets you and connects you with their friends to answer your questions, people who will not gate keep the information that sounds so mysterious. And when that hasn’t happened yet, you learn to be your own person outside your usual friend group, truly learn to be independent. You might also end up joining a club that will become a place of belonging, you won’t forever feel like an imposter.
Kids Help Phone (KHP) is honoured to share creative content submitted by youth from coast to coast to coast as they Feel Out Loud with us. We thank the Feel Out Loud Community Creator of this piece for their contribution to youth mental health and well-being in Canada. For more information on the Feel Out Loud Community Creator Space and / or how you can submit your own creative content for possible publication, you can visit the submission page.
