i know a lot of people.
that’s the funny part.
there are names in my phone,
people in my classes,
faces i smile at in the hallway.
but sometimes
i wonder who would notice
if i disappeared from the room.
not forever.
just quietly.
who would text first?
who would ask where i was?
who would realize
i hadn’t laughed all day?
i miss having a person.
someone i don’t have to wonder about.
someone i can send a stupid thought to
without thinking twice.
sometimes i sit with people
and still feel like
i’m sitting alone.
and i hate admitting that
because it makes me feel ungrateful.
because how can i be lonely
when i’m surrounded?
but maybe loneliness
was never about having no one.
maybe it’s about
not knowing where you belong.
so for now,
i’m learning to sit with myself
without deciding
that being alone
means i’m unwanted.
maybe friendship will find me again.
and until then,
i’m still here.
Kids Help Phone (KHP) is honoured to share creative content submitted by youth from coast to coast to coast as they Feel Out Loud with us. We thank the Feel Out Loud Community Creator of this piece for their contribution to youth mental health and well-being in Canada. For more information on the Feel Out Loud Community Creator Space and / or how you can submit your own creative content for possible publication, you can visit the submission page.
